You Are Not Broken: How Trauma Hides Who You Really Are

Broken or Wounded - Meet Naomi

SPEAKER_02 0:01

What if the parts of you that feel broken aren't broken at all? Just wounded? Today we're talking about trauma, healing, and how to reconnect with the person you were always meant to be. Hi friends, welcome, welcome back. My name is Tiffany. I'm your host of True Crime Connections. With me today is Naomi Morad, a psychosomatic practitioner with over 23 years of experience and specializes in brain spotting. How cool is that? I'd like to welcome you to the show.

SPEAKER_03 0:49

Thank you so much for having me here today, Tiffany.

SPEAKER_02 0:53

Of course.

Brainspotting Explained

SPEAKER_02 0:54

For people who've never heard of brain spotting, how do you explain that?

SPEAKER_03 1:01

How do you explain that? First of all, a lot of people are familiar with EMDR, which is a way to process trauma. And the founder of brain spotting, or the person who discovered it, was David Grant. He was teaching EMDR. And as he was teaching EMDR, he came upon a brain spot. Now I'll explain what a brain spot is. Basically, you know, as you're having a conversation with someone, for example, you see that that person is looking up or to the side, like their head is tilting in a certain direction and they're gazing somewhere into space. And not in order to avoid eye contact with you, you know that they're thinking about what they're talking about. Do you know what I mean? You can picture that, yes. Or, like, like for example, you think of something, and you know, maybe your head might go up towards the ceiling, or you know, as as you're thinking about what you're talking about. Like we do that automatically, like our head goes in a certain direction because that's where basically our eyes connect to. We have the neocortex, which is our logical brain, important to go brush your teeth, to do, to do like day-to-day stuff for driving, for solving problems. And then we have our limbic brain, our subcortex, which holds all of our feelings and our emotions, which stores memory, which stores trauma, and a lot of our like all of our subconscious stuff is stored in that in that limbic brain. And when we look, when our eyes go to certain eye positions as we talk about something that happened in our day, and we're thinking about that, we look there because it it's like an access point to our limbic brain, it helps us process everything that we're talking about. Fascinating. We never knew now. Whenever someone is gonna look in a certain direction as they speak to you, you're gonna be like, What are they processing? Um

How Sessions Work

SPEAKER_03 3:35

brain spotting, let's say a person comes in because they feel overwhelmed, stress, sadness, depression, anxiety, whatever. They have difficulty with food or the relationship issues. It really doesn't matter. To me, it's it doesn't matter what a person comes with. We take that issue and I will say, okay, the stress did you feel right now, where do you feel that in your body? And they will say, my chest, for example. Okay. And then I will find an eye position in their vision field that is related to the stress that they feel in their chest. And then as we find the eye position that exactly connects strongest with that feeling that they're having in the moment and the felt body sense, they begin to process everything that is related to that stress, but not from thinking mind. But it's like you bypass the thinking mind, and everything that is related to that in your life begins to show up. And it's like thoughts popping, popping, popping up in your brain, and you can just process through them. And often people go back even to childhood memories, things that they had completely forgotten, and make connections that then they felt exactly the way they feel now. So it was a long search for what is brain spotting.

SPEAKER_02 5:16

No, you're good, so you gotta bypass the critical faculty. Yes, exactly. Yeah, I find hypnosis very intriguing. I think so much of things can be not corrected, but yeah, because you're kind of rewiring, you're uninstalling all of the trauma that you gave it all this power, and it's like taking your power back, and that's what I love.

SPEAKER_03 5:49

Yes, and the beauty of this, and it's exactly what you do. It's like as you process the trauma and everything that's sitting in your in your subconscious, and you bring it to surface and it gets like cleaned out, it's like a deep clean. Your nervous system begins to regulate itself, and what was taking up space before and causing the stress in your life is suddenly not there anymore. And you feel sort of normal. It's like, you know, sometimes the something hurts in your body, and then the next day someone will ask you, So how's your how's your foot? And you're like, What do you mean? Yeah, your foot, if it was hurting. Oh, yeah, no, that's not there anymore. Because we forget once the pain is gone, it's just not there. We can't even feel it anymore. And brain spotting does that. Obviously, it's a process and it takes time, but that's really what it is. It's like our body goes back, our nervous system goes back to it's like a reset.

SPEAKER_02 6:55

Do we all need a reset?

SPEAKER_03 7:00

And it's not like hypnosis, because in hypnosis, you're it's hypnosis, but here you're fully present, your eyes are open, you can talk through the whole thing, and I'm not telling you what to do. Like in hypnosis, I guide you through the process and I will ask you questions the whole time. In brain spotting, I will help you find the spot and I will be there to support your process, but everything that shows up shows up from your subconscious. That means I'm not asking you, I'm not leading you anyway, I'm being led by you, which is very, very different.

SPEAKER_02 7:45

I can only imagine.

Surviving Dissociation

SPEAKER_02 7:50

So you have mentioned that you survived trafficking and ritual abuse for the first 20 years of your life. At what point did you realize that healing was possible?

SPEAKER_01 8:12

I suffered from severe depression since my teens.

SPEAKER_03 8:16

I was actually had suffered from monic depression. I was either on a complete low or I was on a total high. It was like a ping pong from one to the other.

SPEAKER_01 8:28

Both were unbearable.

SPEAKER_03 8:31

And I knew that something had gone awfully wrong in my life, and that I had no memory since I was nine, even as I was like in my teens growing up in my 20s as well. But I I if you would have told me that I was sexually abused, I would have been like, I don't know what you're talking about. Probably, I don't know how I would have reacted, but I I had like I lived two completely separate lives. There was the life of the abuse and trafficking, and then there was the life where I have breakfast, lunch, and dinner, I go to school, I meet up with my friends, and they were like they happened in parallel constantly, but I could only remember the let's call it normal life where you know I'm I'm aware of I'm going to school, I'm aware I'm sitting down, you know, over dinner. And dissociated, really, completely dissociated. I mean 100%. It was literally one life didn't know about the other. But even though I didn't consciously know, I kept having like a lot of I felt like something was wrong. Something was off, and there were a lot of problems in my parents' house, you know, regardless of the trafficking and everything that was happening. So I I thought it was about my relationship with my mom, and it was about, I don't know, my parents fighting at home, or couldn't say exactly what it was. Anyway, by the time I was 27, I already had two children. My life was honestly great. I had nothing to complain about, and yet I still was completely depressed, and it was so bad at some point that I said, okay, I have to get help. So I went to see actually a somatic body worker, and that's how I started my healing process. And at that point, I felt like my body was completely black on the inside, it was hard to breathe. And a friend said, you know, this guy really helped me. You should go and see him. I was like, okay. And and I started working through my depression, and I started to understand what gets me depressed. I had to be like my own detective at first. You know, I would something would happen, and then I would come home and I'd be depressed. And I would be like, Why am I depressed? And I had to literally learn and backtrack, go through the whole day, what happened, what happened, what happened. Ah, somebody cut the line in front of me at the post office. Could have been something as simple as that. And I was gone. Like I made me angry, but I didn't even know that I had feelings of anger because I was so dissociated that I didn't even know how to feel angry. And once

Choosing to Heal

SPEAKER_03 11:50

I learned the triggers of my depression and I was feeling much, much better, that's when the memories of my past began to surface. And even though I knew I remember exactly the first memory that popped up, and I knew that it was true, and yet I was I felt like the rug had been pulled from underneath my feet.

SPEAKER_01 12:18

And I didn't know if I had strength or the will to face what was in me awaiting me.

SPEAKER_03 12:34

Because that was like I had one or two memories. I didn't understand yet the vastness of everything that I had gone through. And one day I was driving in my car, and I thought, okay, that's it, I'm done. I don't want to do this anymore. And until then, I had always been like with one foot in and one foot out. Like I was here, but I kept that option that maybe one day I don't want to be here anymore. And I remember sitting in my car and I was thinking of crashing in the tree in front of me. And then I thought of my girls that were waiting for me at home.

SPEAKER_01 13:24

And I I couldn't do it. And then I said, okay, if I'm gonna live, I felt like I had to make a choice.

SPEAKER_03 13:38

I couldn't do this one foot in, one foot out anymore. I just had to make a choice. It was like a like a turning point in my life. And I chose to live. And then I said, okay, if I choose to live, then I have to live fully and wholeheartedly. Like there's no more back and forth. Like if I make a decision, then I have to stick with it. And then once I decided that, okay, that was it. This all happened within seconds. I said, okay, if I'm gonna live fully and wholeheartedly, then suddenly the next thought that popped up on my mind was that it's possible to heal 100%. And it really came in those words. It's possible to heal 100%.

SPEAKER_01 14:20

I never looked back.

SPEAKER_03 14:23

From that, my whole life turned around. I mean, it already started once I started my healing process and coping with my depression. Which led really to me uncovering the memories of my past and my childhood trauma. But I think in that moment, I made a full commitment. And then every therapist I saw afterwards, I told them, I'm going to heal 100%. And I remember they all looked at me and they were like, Yeah, you know, 100%. I don't know. And I'm like, no, no, no, you don't understand. I know I can do it.

SPEAKER_02 15:02

It's a long process, but absolutely you can. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 15:07

I mean it's not a very long process, but it's worth every minute of it.

SPEAKER_02 15:12

Absolutely. You definitely made the right decision. Looking back

Supporting Survivors

SPEAKER_02 15:20

now, what do you wish people understood about trauma survivors?

SPEAKER_01 15:29

Oh, I wish people understood about trauma survivors.

SPEAKER_03 15:41

Like I wish people wouldn't feel I think people often feel helpless when they hear a difficult story or they feel like they need to fix or say something. I think what a trauma survivor needs most is to be seen as a person, not to be belittled or feel sorry for, because that's the worst thing you can do. And you know and I think what we want most is just to be seen, to be heard and seen. There's no need to be fixed, there's no need to tell us what to do. I mean just to be present and to um just be with whatever is needed.

SPEAKER_02 16:37

I had to work on that personally, because when you have friends, what do you want to do? You want to help, you want to tell them, well, what about this and what about that? And sometimes they just want you to listen. It's like just shut up and listen to me. I don't want you to tell me what to do. I just need to get it out.

SPEAKER_01 16:58

You learn that too. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 17:02

You as a therapist, you know, it's not people don't want you to fix them. And that's what I love about brain spawning, because I can just be present and hold space for everything that comes up for the person without telling them what to do or what not to do or what's right or what's wrong, because the truth is only we know what's right for us. And we have all of the answers inside us, even if we don't know how to access them. But there are ways for just brain spotting parts work in our child's healing. Like we have, there's so many ways to access that in our knowing, our intuition, to strengthen that intuition, to strengthen that knowing that we all have, even if we have forgotten how to access it.

SPEAKER_02 17:53

Oh, yeah, that's something you have to learn because when I first heard of that, I'm like, how am I talking to an inner child? Like, what? It's like, yeah, you kind of got to talk to the girl who went through all the stuff and let her know it's gonna be okay. That way your cortisol can go down, the stress can go down, and it just it sets you on a whole nother track. What is like a simple exercise that people can do to reconnect with themselves?

SPEAKER_01 18:30

Breathe, connect to your breath.

SPEAKER_03 18:33

When you're stressed, just focusing on your inhale and your exhale. It like brings you back to the moment and takes you out of your mind. Go for a walk in nature, it really helps. I think connecting with nature is something really, really powerful. It can be a forest, beach, river, whatever, you know, somewhere where it's green, colorful.

SPEAKER_01 19:05

All your senses, yes.

SPEAKER_02 19:08

Yes. What are some common

Inner Child Triggers

SPEAKER_02 19:12

signs that our inner child still needs some attention?

SPEAKER_01 19:22

Really anything where we just leg it.

SPEAKER_03 19:28

It's called You know, I look at those those inner child parts like like frozen capsules, capsules in time and space. They're like parts of us that are literally frozen in time and space, and they still relive the teacher screaming at them, the kids laughing at them, the parents hitting them, the parent overdosing, being sexually abused, being homeless. It doesn't matter what the story is, father throwing plates at his child, they are still in that loop frozen. And they will still feel, like we will feel today, like something, you know, when someone pushes your buttons, like suddenly you react and you're like really angry or insulted, or you know, you say, How dare you talk to me like that? And somebody else will say, I don't know what the big deal is, because they don't have that trigger, but you do. And when something gets triggered in you, then you know that there is a younger part that was triggered that is holding that pain, that is still sulking, still insulted. Like people who get insulted a lot. There's that younger part still sulking, still feeling unheard and unseen. And we don't have just one younger part, we have many. And it's it's every time we go back to one of those younger parts, we reclaim another piece of ourselves. We become we can't we become witness to when they to what they what happened to them. Because in that moment of trauma, the person felt completely alone, isolated in their own pain, in their story. And when we become witness to that, then the younger part doesn't have to carry that pain alone anymore.

SPEAKER_02 21:40

Pay attention to your triggers. Yeah, it's telling you something. That's just that's so powerful.

SPEAKER_01 21:51

It really is. And I kinda like I got a visual of like this little

SPEAKER_02 22:00

Like you said, just floating up in space. And it just it makes so much sense. So obviously, this is a lifelong journey. You don't, you know, you don't arrive tomorrow at noon. Well, I know

Facing the Pain

SPEAKER_02 22:18

a lot of people they're scared to take that journey because it is long, it can be painful. And I think a lot of people find it easier to bury it rather than confront it. What would you tell those people?

SPEAKER_03 22:36

I would tell those people that even though they're afraid to confront it, that pain they wake up with in the morning. It affects the way they are with their families, with their spouse, with their children at work. You take it basically to breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Always there. Like you don't want to look at it, but it's constantly in your facing, it's constantly interfering in your life, in your relationships, literally in everything that you do. And it often seems so scary to actually look at the pain. But from my experience, once you make that decision, it's much easier to look at the pain and to understand it, and then you can then changes really begin to happen, and your life only begins to better. Never gets worse. And yes, maybe it's painful to to feel it, but on the other hand, we feel it all the time because it's sitting there and it's bothering us, and it's taking up so much energy, emotional energy, and it drains us or it makes us nervous, makes us restless, and we go drink, we go smoke, we we keep ourselves super busy, just not to feel. There's so many things that that people do in order not to feel because they're so scared to feel, even though that feeling, the underlying feeling, is there all the time.

SPEAKER_02 24:15

It's a great point. People are afraid to look at it and to deal with it, but you're dealing with it regardless, but in a negative way.

SPEAKER_03 24:27

Yes, and it's so empowering and so freeing and healing when you actually stop and make that choice to confront. Basically, it's confronting yourself, confronting your past, but it's making sense of your lives. I see the relief in people's faces, even when they're crying, you know, and crying is healing, it's releasing the relief, and oh, that's what happened. All right, you know, the the the when the pennies begin to drop and like things begin to make sense. There's no greater gift than staying than than getting that instead of staying in the dark.

SPEAKER_02 25:15

I can only imagine how beautiful it is to do what you do and then to actually see someone like get it.

SPEAKER_03 25:24

Yes. Yes, very much. Brain spotting is really when I say pennies dropping, it's often like every session, there's pennies dropping for people. There's like aha moments every time. That's just the kind of technique it is. It's so powerful and so beautiful to work with it.

SPEAKER_01 25:47

So interesting.

SPEAKER_03 25:51

It's also been the greatest gift for my healing, even though I had already done so much healing. Prior to that, the brain spotting took my healing over the last four years. I got certified in 22. It took it to a whole other level, a whole other depth. That no other modality. And I've studied so many things for since the year 2000. I've always, always been studying something, like always getting certified in different modalities, body, mind. And brain spotting just opened a door that I didn't even know existed.

SPEAKER_02 26:34

You can you can do it to yourself.

SPEAKER_03 26:37

Like I didn't know if you had to be kind of walked through it or you can do it to your with yourself, and I recall it self-spotting, but it's not the same as sitting with someone who holds the space for you or is there to guide you and to hold you. The results are different. And like on a day-to-day, instead of meditating where I used to meditate every day, now I self-spot every day. That's my meditation in the morning. So it's great. I get a lot out of it, but I get more out of it usually when I sit with someone.

SPEAKER_01 27:23

That makes sense. Everybody pretty much you need a guide. But yeah. You can self-spot. How long do the sessions usually last? An hour.

SPEAKER_03 27:39

Some clients like longer sessions, so it can be an hour and 15 or an hour and a half, but mostly an hour. I work with people once a week for an hour.

SPEAKER_02 27:51

Do you do in person, virtual, or both?

SPEAKER_03 27:54

Both. Both. Yes. And because I'm a psychosomatic practitioner, I can work with people all over the world.

SPEAKER_00 28:06

That's cool.

SPEAKER_03 28:07

That that is cool. That is cool.

SPEAKER_02 28:12

I always thought, like, when I first started this, I was hearing about all these different modalities. I was like, oh my gosh, there's so many cool things out there. And then, you know, COVID happened and the world shut down, and so a lot of people started doing things online. And I was always like, how can you get a good read if you're online? But it makes sense to me now. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 28:37

Especially if it's one-on-one. When there's many people on Zoom, I online, I don't like it. But one-on-one works really well.

SPEAKER_01 28:49

You gotta be present.

SPEAKER_03 28:54

Remember my first during COVID, there was a new client that reached out to me, and it happened to be my first online session. And I was horrified. I'm very not technical. I have improved much, but I had but as a very non-technical person, I had the worst internet connection that day. My my internet fell at least three, four times during the session. And then I said, why don't we do phone backup? We have let's mute the computer and I have backup on the phone. So even if the computer crashes, I still have you online. And then the the phone line crashed twice. I'm like, you know, I felt like the universe was really interesting me that day. And then she wanted to come back, and I was like, oh, it works. Oh these interruptions, it's funny too big.

SPEAKER_02 29:59

That's funny. See, you just had to get the confidence.

SPEAKER_01 30:12

Maybe you were in a mercury retrograde. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 30:21

I just love that all these things are available now because I don't remember any of this stuff being around when I was a kid, a teenager. And I think if anyone did practice anything like this, they would keep it to themselves because they'd be scared they'd be called like woo-woo or something, you know?

SPEAKER_03 30:43

Yeah, yeah. It was looked upon as as very weird.

SPEAKER_02 30:50

Yeah, people swear by it now.

SPEAKER_03 30:54

Listen, it opens up a lot of doors. I still love it when people come to see me in person in my practice. I I do love that in my office, but I don't mind working online, like it works great, but I can't say that one works better than the other. That is the truth. I I just love the human interaction of sitting in my office with a person. But from results-wise, there's absolutely no difference.

SPEAKER_02 31:27

How long usually does it take? I mean, obviously, it would depend on people's trauma and stuff like that, but like, is this something that they would need to do for a couple months, a couple years, or are you just you're in this for life?

SPEAKER_03 31:44

You're not in this for life. I think we're in our healing process, we are in for life. Because once you step onto that journey of self-discovery and healing, I think we always want to learn more. I don't know. Could you imagine yourself not doing what you're doing anymore and stopping now?

SPEAKER_01 32:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 32:09

Yeah. No. So once you get hooked, you get hooked. And you want to continue feeling better. With that being said, brain spotting and the work I do, the parts work and inner child healing works extremely fast with trauma. When I say extremely fast, I sometimes get clients that spend 10, 12, 15 years sitting with a psychologist and they're still dealing with the same pain and the same issue. They might understand it a lot better, but they cannot, nothing is really changing in their lives. Whereas with brain spotting, after every session, as crazy as this sounds, there's a shift. And you have a lot of insights, and the way you look at life begins to shift very quickly. You begin to understand your the dynamics with the people around you. They begin to shift and change. And still, there's no magic. But you will not sit in my office for 10 years, I promise you that.

SPEAKER_01 33:31

Most people will stay with me on average between one to three years.

SPEAKER_03 33:42

Some will be less, some will be longer, but that's like the average where people feel like I've done so much progress, and I feel so much better in my life, and I'm ready to move on on my own.

SPEAKER_01 33:58

Right. They finally have the tools that they need to move forward.

SPEAKER_03 34:05

The tools and the inner resources. And they when I say inner resources, also they have a much better understanding of who they really are and not who they believe they are or the box they will put into. They actually have a much better understanding of who they are at their core.

SPEAKER_02 34:30

Love that. Love what you just said. Who they thought they were, or the box that they were in. Oh my god, that just gave me goosebumps. I love that because it's a beautiful moment when you realize that all the things that you thought that you were and you couldn't do, and it's all lies that you told yourself to protect yourself.

SPEAKER_03 34:57

So true.

SPEAKER_01 34:59

All lies that you told yourself to protect yourself. Very true.

SPEAKER_02 35:08

I think once you can start to figure that out, like your life really does get better. And I tell my listeners all the time, you are not stuck. You're not stuck. Whether you're in an abusive relationship or a dead end job or whatever it may be, there's another side to this. You don't need to stay where you are.

SPEAKER_03 35:32

It's very true. And I think people often stay where they are because it's what they know. And often, even though what we know sucks and it feels horrible, and we're suffering, but somehow we're comfortable. There's there's a certain comfort in that suffering. You know how to expect, you know how to deal with your own shit, with your own pain, with your depression, with your anxiety. It's like you have your rituals around it, or you know, you have your own coping mechanism. Not that it's a good one, but that's that's what you know because you've known your whole life. And suddenly it's it's scary. Change is something that is scary for people in general. And giving out of an abusive relationship, making a change, means that your coping skills are not going to work anymore, and you have to learn something new, and you have to expose yourself to something new. And maybe you'll have to leave the relationship and you won't have that partner that you've been leaning on, although it's been very abusive. So that change is very, very scary for people. Often we will only be willing to make that change if the pain is bigger than the gain.

SPEAKER_01 37:08

If that makes sense, makes perfect sense. Right?

SPEAKER_02 37:16

Oh god, just when you step on the other side of that door, it's just like the birds are chirping, the sun shining, the winds in your hair. It's just it's a whole nother life. And I just hate for people to not experience that.

SPEAKER_03 37:36

Yeah, I I agree. I'm I'm I'm with you. And I spoke to somebody before this podcast, and and I said that's the reason I speak on podcasts because I want people to know that there is another way. That there is a way out. It doesn't matter what you went through in life and how dark your life is, and how difficult and how painful, there is a way out.

SPEAKER_01 38:07

You can heal from anything. You gotta allow yourself to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Everyone deserves to be happy. Allow yourself to feel that.

SPEAKER_03 38:31

I think I never thought I would say that, but I I I think it takes courage also to step out of what you're in and to try something new. To to have enough trust that it's possible. You gotta have faith that there is a different way, that there is something out there if you really want it. And I think people who really, really want it, they find a way. Even if it takes them a long time. But eventually they find a way. And there's also a moment of readiness. You know, I have clients that come to me in their mid-late 50s sometimes. And they say, I wish I would have started this 20 years ago.

SPEAKER_01 39:16

And I would say you're only ready when you're ready.

SPEAKER_03 39:23

And maybe we see, you know, relationships or people where we say, get up already, you know, do something. Stop being the victim, stop suffering, like go get up and leave and do, and you want to save them, but they're not ready. I think there's nothing harder than to watch people that you love and care about in pain. And all you want to do is just, you know, think, get get up, you know. There's something, there's another world out there, but if they're not ready, they're not ready.

SPEAKER_01 40:00

For whatever reason, it won't work. It won't work.

SPEAKER_02 40:12

If somebody wanted

Next Steps and Closing

SPEAKER_02 40:13

to work with you, what's the best way to find you? Because I'm gonna make sure I put all your details in the show notes.

SPEAKER_03 40:20

Best way to find me is through my website, naomirad.com. And I always offer a free consultation, first meeting, online on Zoom with anyone. And it's a great time where we can get to know each other, see for a good fit. They can ask any questions they have, any concerns, and then we take it from there.

SPEAKER_01 40:47

Love it. Simple, easy peasy.

SPEAKER_00 40:54

Yeah, definitely.

SPEAKER_02 40:57

Do you have any words of advice for people who are on the fence? I know obviously we were just talking about you gotta be ready, but if someone really wants it, but they're just they're they're right there at that line.

SPEAKER_01 41:19

I'm thinking. Oh, you're good. I get it. I wanna say there.

SPEAKER_03 41:29

You know? Put out a toe, see how it feels, take small steps. You don't have to take the biggest step at first. Do small things, start with little things for yourself. If you're not ready for therapy, do little things, give yourself a treat here or there, take yourself for a walk, download some meditations, listen to some podcasts, like like open your horizon, just explore what works for you and what doesn't, what feels good. Notice the things that make you feel better. Great, keep doing that. Things that you notice that don't make you feel good. And every time you keep going back to those places, you don't feel good. You know, just noticing, even if you can't make the change, but notice what it feels like when you do things that are good for you, and notice what it feels like when there are things that not don't.

SPEAKER_02 42:32

It's all about building awareness and becoming aware of what makes me happy and what doesn't, what is good for me, start doing little steps, journal the things that you feel are working for you, or write down the things that you that no longer serve you. Yes, journal.

SPEAKER_03 43:03

I love journaling, I'm a big fan of journaling, definitely.

SPEAKER_01 43:07

I have not mentioned that, definitely. Journal.

SPEAKER_02 43:16

There's a saying that I love it's you don't have to see the full staircase, you just have to take the first step.

SPEAKER_03 43:24

It's a beautiful saying, but definitely once you're comfortable with the first step, then see what the next one might be.

SPEAKER_01 43:33

You know, there's no rush. See what's right.

SPEAKER_03 43:42

Everything was always here, always available when you're ready for it. And something that I have discovered along my journey is whenever I was ready for the next step, the right person showed up. It's all about, you know, where your focus is. If your focus is on all the negativity in your life, then you will attract more and more of that. That just it's like a magnet. But if you focus on different things and things where you want help or growth or expansion in your life or new things, new people, they will show up. Someone to help you with whatever specific topic in your life, those people will show up if if your intention is there and you're focused on that, it just begins to happen.

SPEAKER_02 44:40

I've noticed that the resources just appear. Like when the student is ready, the lessons appear.

SPEAKER_03 44:48

Right? Isn't that amazing? It really works that way. And I think that's why there's that saying took me years to understand it. But the way I understand it today is when people say when it pours, it rains, that saying. I think it's because when we're focused, all of our focuses on negativity, then we attract one catastrophe after another. And then the car breaks down, and then you have, I don't know, water coming into your house, and then you have this, and that you know, it's like one attracts the next. But you can also say when the sun shines, it becomes sunnier and warmer, you know, and then you bring in the opposite, all of the positives. So I trust the process.

SPEAKER_01 45:34

Yes, the long fucking process. It's worth it.

SPEAKER_02 45:48

It's so worth it. It takes a while for a reason because kind of like what we said earlier, if it comes to you and you're not ready for it, it's it's not gonna work. So you gotta expect for it to come when you're ready to accept it.

SPEAKER_03 46:09

Yes, and it's a process, you know. We don't break down the walls that we've built our whole lives in order to keep ourselves safe and to protect ourselves in one day, we wouldn't be able to survive that. There's a reason we've dissociated, there's a reason we've created those walls, they're there to protect us, and those are parts that are important, and with time those walls begin to crumble, but slowly when we're ready with each step along the way. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 46:50

Was there anything else that you wanted to add?

SPEAKER_03 46:55

No, I think unless you have another question, I can't think of something right now.

SPEAKER_02 47:02

No, I this was great, and I appreciate it. I think my listeners are definitely gonna take something away from it, which is super important. And it's just all about being one with yourself, trust yourself.

SPEAKER_03 47:18

Yeah, and I think it takes a while to trust yourself, even today, after having done this for so many years. There are moments sometimes where I have to check like, what is it that I really want? What is really right? Should I do this or should I not? And it's okay not to know sometimes and just to sit with it until we know.

SPEAKER_02 47:39

That's how you find out. Well then, Naomi, I want to thank you so much for being here. I really appreciate it.

SPEAKER_03 47:50

I want to thank you for having me, and I really enjoyed being on your show. And I don't say that about everyone, but you've been a great host.

SPEAKER_02 47:58

Oh, thank you. I appreciate that. Definitely. Thank you. Thank you.